288, I haven't been here in 13 years.  I haven't given up even though last night I hit rock bottom and sank even further.  It's funny how life wants life no matter what.  You can try but it will fight for survival.  I guess I am in this till the finish of this mother-f****ing journey.  I was very much liking myself and the things I had started to do again.  I should finish those things I started.  I am truly sorry for leaning so heavy on others.

Also The pool at the gym is closed for 2 weeks and I now have to drive 25 minutes to swim.  Means getting up at 4am now and not getting home form the gym till well past 11pm in the evening.  Not sure how this is going to go for me.