I am below 300 now and have my eyes on the next milestone.  I think I may be there by Thanksgiving at the rate I am pushing myself.  The aches and pains are worth the number of little hoorays I have had over the past month and half.  I still can't look at the whole journey as it is a long path in front of me and sometimes it looks over whelming but I stay the course.  I have to; no one can make this journey for me and it is only I who will reap the rewards at the end of it.  What the rewards will be I have my doubts now.  I see a number of possible outcomes but I can't and shouldn't focus on them or else I will stumble in the here and now.  I have to stay in the here and now and push on.  I know it's a day to day living but at this time in my life I am rebuilding and that rebuilding takes time.  It took time to a lot of time to get where I was at the beginning of this journey and it can't be solved over night or with the wave of a wand.  Oh if it were so easy as that; would it be valued to me after it was done?  I doubt it.  As I taught my daughter, the things we work hard for have more value than those things that are just handed to us. 

Tonight is dance night and I have been practicing the ChaCha steps.  Hopefully I will do better tonight than on last Sunday.  I am having fun with the dancing even though I still suck at it.  It does make me smile and that's a good thing these days as smiles are a rarity.  I have started a new project to help me with my sense of humor and I look forward each day not to working on it.  Maybe at the end of all this I will be thin, laughing, and smiling.